Connecting in the Singleton World

[Cammy]

Relating to others is often hard. I try to think of the fact that everyone regardless of whether they are multiple or monominded are all experiencing their lives from their own unique perspectives - perspectives that we can never really fully appreciate as we do not live inside their minds. I was often intrigued by the science fiction notion of the Vulcan mind meld. Such a technique would really be the only way that human beings could truly experience the mind nad perspective of another individual. I often thought that if a monomind ever melded with a multiple, they would probably be screaming to be let out within a few minutes.

It is basic human nature to want to be understood by another human being. In our case, we have an uphill struggle often just understanding ourselves and the varied perspectives of our multiple selves. I have reached out to monominds before, not via disclosure, but generally with a common experience as the basis for contact. People seem to gravitate towards me when they are experiencing psychological upheaval, and on this basis I can establish trust, rapport, and even sometimes begin forging a fruitful relationship. I suppose I try and look for commonalities in experience in order to reach out and relate. While much of my experience is alien to the monomind, it does not mean that there cannot be many things that do exist upon common ground. Yet, I find that the need for isolation seems to be much more prevalent than it is for the monominded population. Too many triggers when people are involved it seems, hence the need for a lot of restorative alone time.

One more aspect of DID that may also produce a sense of apartness is the fact that many multiples are either above average or genius IQs. This in itself has a tendency to produce viewpoints and perspectives that are outside the norm. Unfortunately the high IQ may well be the engine that drove the mind to build such a sophisticated coping mechanism in the first place, and possessing a high IQ is frequently an isolating experience. Double whammy.