sad
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Silent Society Offline
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#1
sad
My friend had a baby recently, her third. It has been about a week and a half since he showed up. I am having a really hard time with it. There are not big overwhelming feelings about this, just a complete lack of wanting to talk to her. This is my closest 3D friend and I really care about her. Our relationship was a complete surprise to me as I had withdrawn from everyone who was not absolutely necessary to interact with when I met her.
Because of all the bad stuff that happened when we were young, I was never able to have children. I have come to some level of peace about it but it is still a difficult subject. There are many reasons why it was best for us to not be able to have children, not the least of which that I would have f@#$#ed it up entirely because of the poor model for parenting that I had. Also, the only time that others from the inside have taken over is in medical situations. I can only imagine how difficult it would have been for us to tolerate childbirth. Also, I am just learning how to parent my inside ones and they still need SO much time and support. I know it is best we did not have children, but I am very sad.
I really dont know how to resolve this. She has called twice, but i have ignored the calls. I have no desire to listen to screaming children or anything about her life right now. She is super sensitive, always thinking she has done something to upset me, and I have no desire to deal with that either. Dont know how to resolve this. Just wanted to write about it.
02-07-2015, 02:41 AM
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MakersDozn Offline
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#2
Friendship/Support  RE: sad
We're sorry that this is so painful for you.

If you're not up to calling her, can you send her a brief email? And follow up later when you're able?

Just a thought.

MDs
02-07-2015, 08:39 PM
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Silent Society Offline
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#3
RE: sad
Thank you for the flower. Is appreciated.
02-08-2015, 01:58 AM
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nats Offline
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#4
RE: sad
does she have any awareness/empathy for your reality that you don't have children b/c of difficult life circumstances and someone else's obvious abundance can be painful? we get very sensitive when seeing dual-parent families with ever more children - we don't hate them, just feel sad for what was never going to happen for us.. so, sending blue flowers..
Blush Learn how to manage conflict, because the greater the level you can tolerate, the more freedom you will retain - E. Walsh Smile
02-12-2015, 09:05 AM
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