Know what I like about this place?
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The People Offline
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#1
Other/All/Unsure   Know what I like about this place?
No cross talk. Nobody saying you should do this and you shouldn't do that.

There is a web site for going GF on facebook. I can only handle it for a few minutes at a time. According t some of the extremists who go there everything I do or eat etc is WRONG! It is crazy making. Especially for a person with an ED to begin with. And some people are so arrogant in their expertise. WTF! They are not doctors. No 2 of us have bodies - or minds - that work the same. Even with the same physical illness.

I am glad the "you should" are not part of the daily milieu of this site. Respect for others and respect for self. Yup. I slip up sometimes with my big mouth coming out of my hands. But I am reeled in and remember the respect and the rules.
(This post was last modified: 12-27-2014, 04:20 PM by The People.)
12-27-2014, 04:18 PM
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MakersDozn Offline
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#2
Agree  RE: Know what I like about this place?
Well-said. Respect. And accountability.

Thanks for posting this. We've been feeling discouraged in general, and the support and the respectful dialogue help.

MDs
12-27-2014, 08:11 PM
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nats Offline
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#3
RE: Know what I like about this place?
MDs, you always impress us with your articulate and common-sense postings. sorry you're struggling now. you've certainly had enough going on this year to give people inside reason to pause/reflect. life and processing really does take as long as it takes i guess, no matter how much we might want to speed up the process..
Blush Learn how to manage conflict, because the greater the level you can tolerate, the more freedom you will retain - E. Walsh Smile
12-28-2014, 06:15 AM
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MakersDozn Offline
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Friendship/Support  RE: Know what I like about this place?
Thanks, nats. Much appreciated.

life and processing really does take as long as it takes i guess, no matter how much we might want to speed up the process..

We really relate to this. We'd love to be able to wave a magic wand and *poof!* have everything heal at our desired pace. It's hard to be patient sometimes.

MDs
12-29-2014, 11:17 PM
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The People Offline
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#5
Friendship/Support  RE: Know what I like about this place?
here is a quote that says "Patience is a virtue but not one of mine!" I would have bought it but it sort of brands me rather than encouraging me to work toward it. Ah well.
I Am My Only Chance For A Hero!
01-02-2015, 06:47 PM
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tweeter Offline
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#6
Agree  RE: Know what I like about this place?
Hi, I promised to answer you re another post, thinking it would be easy. It wasn't. I got stuck. I'll get back to that.

Hmmm, patience. Experience has shown me that what is often called patience is overrated. I've learned for myself that I didn't know when to make a move, justified by patience. Not being impulsive by nature, it was too easy for me to be sc*r*d into immobility by someone else's insistence that I be patient, go with the flow, and so forth. It got worse than that, and I had to face it. My natural tenacity led to perseverance in the wrong direction at the wrong time. A way of being kept in one's place, especially when I thought I could make up for the lost time. No. Everyone makes mistakes.

Not that I can't move fast at times, generally because my mind was already made up (in terms of a like theoretical situation), and all I needed was unobstructed opportunity if it came to pass. What about the few and far between wonderful opportunities, or slight advancements, that are nice and challenging Surprises? Oh boy.

I realized that knowing when and how to act go far beyond having patience and perseverance. For me, that amounts to a personal re-definition of patience and timing, which are far more flexible, or inflexible, than I had understood. It's easier to get it when one runs out of runway. I'm still kind of tentative, but thinking thru better. Yeah, branding by others and internalizing that cr*p really did a job on this life.

The No Cross Talk rule is something I value. In that stillness I translate another person's work/opinion in terms of my own, having time to hear and feel, rather than sit in judgment. Relevance to my feelings does not equal the value of another person's point of view. Judgment is another step, at another time, separate, in the right ways, by the right people.

Yeah, I know. Just as wordy as ever. shrug.

tweeter
"Even the very emptiest of the emptiest
Has a false bottom, a false bottom."
01-04-2015, 11:23 PM
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nats Offline
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#7
RE: Know what I like about this place?
Tweeter! great to see you!!!
Blush Learn how to manage conflict, because the greater the level you can tolerate, the more freedom you will retain - E. Walsh Smile
01-05-2015, 02:24 PM
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tweeter Offline
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RE: Know what I like about this place?
Delighted! Thanks. Same.
As I experiment with my personal gearbox of life (term learned, well, kind of, from BBC Top Gear shows). Jeremy Clarkson was going on how American view of the gearbox was too simplistic. I didn't find that hard to believe.... I finally Googled gearbox just now. Foreign territory for the non-mechanically inclined. Well, it took me about 3 years just to do that. Intuitively, I'm on to something.

cheerios,
tweeter

P.S.: couldn't get the Smilies to work.
"Even the very emptiest of the emptiest
Has a false bottom, a false bottom."
01-06-2015, 06:05 AM
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orek Offline
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#9
RE: Know what I like about this place?
Yes, Tweeter, what nats said! I was thinking the same thing. Smile

I also like that this place allows discussion and respects differences. So important!
01-08-2015, 12:31 AM
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MakersDozn Offline
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#10
Friendship/Support  RE: Know what I like about this place?
Adding our "glad to see you, tweeter" to the list. We need to get together for lunch soon. When it's not so cold that we'll freeze our butts off. Undecided

Yeah, the smilies (among other things) are a little wonky right now, but we're hoping that these things will be fixed soon.

MDs
01-08-2015, 12:03 PM
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The People Offline
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#11
RE: Know what I like about this place?
Hi Tweeter! Nope. The smiles to the left are in for repair. You have to add them manually if you want one,Wink. Nice to hear from you.
I Am My Only Chance For A Hero!
01-08-2015, 10:07 PM
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tweeter Offline
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#12
RE: Know what I like about this place?
Hi, thanks for your greeting.
It's an oddly calm day, in the middle of upheavals here there and everywhere, it seems. Listening to Bach Mass in B Minor.
tweets
"Even the very emptiest of the emptiest
Has a false bottom, a false bottom."
01-09-2015, 04:00 PM
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tweeter Offline
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#13
RE: Know what I like about this place?
Hi, orek. Thanks.
It's a wonderful picture you have posted!
tweets
"Even the very emptiest of the emptiest
Has a false bottom, a false bottom."
01-09-2015, 04:12 PM
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tweeter Offline
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Friendship/Support  RE: Know what I like about this place?
Hi MDs! Lunch sounds lovely.
Ha ha, I was out and about yesterday, in the lovely cold. Did well, except that I might need better gloves. My regular wool ones, which I got in Boston, and only for especially cold days, didn't work, not even with an acrylic pair underneath.
peace,
tweets
"Even the very emptiest of the emptiest
Has a false bottom, a false bottom."
01-09-2015, 04:37 PM
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MakersDozn Offline
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#15
Doing okay  RE: Know what I like about this place?
We broke out the ski pants on Thursday, it was so cold. Extra layers. Today it was a balmy 30ish-F. The worst seems over for now, knock on wood.

We'll see when we might be feeling up to the lunch thing. Depends on how annoyed we get at people at work *coughBOSScough*, and how much stress we're feeling with FOO and health issues as well.

Glad to see more posting here.

Laura and others
01-10-2015, 09:00 PM
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