New member needs help

[Phoenix1221]

Hi again. Thanks for input. I will get the book and It is so helpful to hear from people who have lived this. My Mom has been with me through this since the beginning and even she is saying I'm crazy to stay. My husband keeps telling me I can go, too.

My husbands family of origin naturally had two boys, just like us. So yes, the boys are a powerful trigger--now it is more day-to-day stuff that triggers. Was way worse when they were younger. Main focus seems to be on me now. Spouse had very controlling, narcissistic and emotionally abusive mother who was involved in the physical abuse along with the father. There are major issues with Mom and it seems there is a lot that gets transferred to me.

Seeing T today so hopefully she can help me find clarity. The silent treatment is killing me, thanks to my own abandonment issues.