Frustrated and feeling hopeless

[Tangled Web]

This therapy thing is not working! It all feels so pointless.
We try to get close to the others and hear them, listen to them but then the twinges of feelings start and we end up fighting against it to stop the tears, to stop the pain. It ALWAYS happens that way! And we end up in the same spot we were before-that NEVER changes! It feels so f*ck*ng pointless. All this time we have been trying to connect ourselves, connect with the feelings but every time we get anywhere near it we fight to stop it. We don’t know how to change that and right now we don’t think we can or even want to anymore. So what is the point? We are so tired of this. When is enough Enough? When do stop banging your head against this huge brick wall and say ok enough! And just accept things the way they are. How do you try to change something we don’t have any control over it? It isn’t as easy as of just having a choice. Even if we say ok I will sit these feelings and let myself cry………..something else takes over and the fight begins to push everything away again. You are CONSTANTLY at war with yourself!!!!!!!!! And it is a war we never ever seem to win unless something goes completely out of control and that is when the flood gates open. Everything just feels so pointless. We don’t know why we are continuing to do this ourselves. It feels completely f*ck*ng pointless.