comment on forgiveness..

[Tangled Web]

(04-28-2014, 03:28 AM)nats Wrote: what do you think?:

"Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is okay.” It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.” "

Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is okay.” It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.” "

I completely agree with this statement!
I have a tool that was given to me by an old T regarding forgiveness……..
It says-
Forgiveness IS……
Optional
A way to release resentments and let go of the past
A gift we give ourselves
An act that makes no demands
An attitude and framework for action
A process that takes time
A decision that rests with US
Forgiveness is NOT……..
Something you have to do
The same for everyone
Granting pardon
Excusing
Condoning
Reconciliation
A “snap” decision
A decision that depends on someone else.
There are steps to forgiveness and it is a process. Every step in the process of forgiveness requires your consent…….
Step 1-Identify the wrongdoing
Step 2- Identify what you want to forgive
Step 3- The ritual of forgiving
Step 4-Moving forward
Author unknown.

I don’t think forgiveness is conditional. I think it should be solely based on you and your own experiences and feelings around the situation. There are no ultimatums or choices you give the person you are choosing to forgive. It should be based entirely on you and what you need. IMO
Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is okay.” It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.” "

I completely agree with this statement! This is a perfect of example of taking YOUR own power back and NOT letting them ruin your life forever.