Semantics
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MakersDozn Offline
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#16
Friendship/Support  RE: Semantics
LOL, orek....we like your sense of humor.

We feel very similar to what you wrote. In particular, seeing the body as a container. We don't necessarily think that this is a bad thing; we know it's only natural for some of us to ID more with the body than others, and we don't want to pressure anyone in this regard. So we view the body as a "house" or "bus" and leave it at that.

MDs
01-08-2015, 01:55 PM
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nats Offline
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#17
RE: Semantics
hi orek, as usual you describe things more clearly than we do ;-). there are a lot of similarities with what you describe. our separations also seem to have started in infancy. we don't know the extremity of our history b/c we don't remember any of it, good or bad, but we can piece together a certain amount. for years we thought it must be very extreme b/c we couldn't remember. however, based on what we pieced together it makes more sense that the very early start affected memory and response patterns perhaps in a somewhat similar way to someone who had later more extreme abuse. it's guesswork, admittedly.
Blush Learn how to manage conflict, because the greater the level you can tolerate, the more freedom you will retain - E. Walsh Smile
01-09-2015, 05:33 AM
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Tangled Web Offline
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#18
RE: Semantics
Orek we can really identify with what you have said. We also see the body as a shell and interesting comment about your T and how in saying that helps keep things disconnected. That makes a lot of sense to me. We also have people waiting on deck so to speak to mesh with the people on the outside so they don't have to come all the way out and we aren't pushed back in. A lot of similarities there. Glad you posted. As always it SO great to see you.
TW
"You may not remember what someone says or does, but you will never forget how they made you feel" Mac Anderson.
01-09-2015, 12:45 PM
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orek Offline
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#19
RE: Semantics
"We don't know the extremity of our history b/c we don't remember any of it, good or bad, but we can piece together a certain amount. for years we thought it must be very extreme b/c we couldn't remember. however, based on what we pieced together it makes more sense that the very early start affected memory and response patterns perhaps in a somewhat similar way to someone who had later more extreme abuse. it's guesswork, admittedly."

Nats, I could have written that! Still trying to piece our history together, and though we have definite pieces of the puzzle fitting together finally after our work with our last T, we still don't "remember" our history and have yet to know for sure the extent and degree and duration of it all. (The only specific incident of abuse I'm absolutely confident happened without the hemming/hawing doubts is one that occurred (probably repeatedly) in infancy--because a baby showed up in therapy and showed us and T what happened. No way I could have made that up or even begun to "dramatize" such a thing even if I had wanted to, which of course I didn't and wouldn't.) Have very spotty and/or blank memory before HS, and even then the first two years are very sparse, surreal, and disjointed. Only starting junior year do I feel I have any sense of a somewhat cohesive memory and narrative, albeit with the limitations of a more "normal" bad memory. I, too, have questioned whether this and the poly-fracturing was due to severity of abuse, but like you also wonder if isn't simply due to its extremely early onset. And of course, both can occur.

It so helps to have others who can read and understand and even reflect our own experiences. I don't feel nearly so crazy! Tongue I'm grateful for you all.
01-10-2015, 04:17 AM
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orek Offline
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#20
Agree  RE: Semantics
"We also have people waiting on deck so to speak to mesh with the people on the outside so they don't have to come all the way out and we aren't pushed back in."

Cool, Tangled! I don't recall if anyone else ever mentioned also operating that way. (Of course, with this sieve for a brain, it could be a daily post and I still may not recall. ; ) But it's so nice to know others have the same system in place. I think I like your word, "mesh," a bit better than "blend." I may steal that. Check's in the mail. ;P
01-10-2015, 04:24 AM
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Tangled Web Offline
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#21
RE: Semantics
LMAO Orek, you are priceless to us Smile
"You may not remember what someone says or does, but you will never forget how they made you feel" Mac Anderson.
01-10-2015, 04:05 PM
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orek Offline
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#22
RE: Semantics
Right back at'cha! Smile
01-12-2015, 11:50 PM
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