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On friendships - Printable Version

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On friendships - The People - 01-16-2020

Do you find that you have friends who put you last behind the cat? Don't get me wrong, I love their cat as does Katy. They did have a tough quarter but I never saw them until they dropped the kitty off at Christmas. Soam I a friend or a pet sitter?

They told me they would invite me for dinner this weekend. This means Sunday night because their social life with their real friends happens on Friday and Saturday. It really hurts. I have known them for over 30 years although they came and went as jobs changed.

Most of their friends are couples. I am single. So I get the leftovers. It really hurts!


RE: On friendships - nats - 01-19-2020

this seems to be a very pragmatic approach by many people nowadays, in which they have different types of friendships for different purposes. maybe it was always this way. it works great for those who have a lot of friends and badly for those who don't.

seems like they aren't able to give you the kind of friendship you want. if you've known each other a long time it's even less likely to change. it doesn't sound worth your emotional investment except maybe for the kitty. really sorry it's so painful!


RE: On friendships - The People - 01-21-2020

We did have a nice evening out together on Sunday at my invitation. I had won a gift certificate. We had a great evening. The husband has a very stressful job plus he lost his father in the fall. I know that they care about me and that their life is busy. And they do have many friends while I don't have many at all.

Thanks for listening Nats.


RE: On friendships - nats - 01-21-2020

we have several very lovely friends who never have time for us. it's not that they're bad or don't care. they just have different priorities and many other friends. so, we rarely see them and pretend it doesn't bother us. we can't change them, only us.


RE: On friendships - The People - 01-24-2020

Exactly Nats.